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Article: What Not to Say to An Expecting Mama

What Not to Say to An Expecting Mama
mom health

What Not to Say to An Expecting Mama

News of a pregnancy is usually met with a gamut of emotions: excitement, joy, surprise, anticipation, and tons of curiosity.

Everybody wants to contribute their two cents, be it family, friends, neighbours, colleagues, or even strangers…

And while the sentiment is usually a positive one, sometimes the conversation veers towards being judgemental and intrusive.

Expecting mums are bombarded with questions that range from pleasantly interested, to morbidly inquisitive.

At a time when one should be given their time and space to process the news, they are sadly barraged with comments and advice.

Well-intentioned but unsolicited!

It’s amazing how quickly people can forget that a pregnant woman is still, well, a human being.

So, here’s a gentle reminder to give expecting mamas the boundaries and respect that they deserve.

Experts stress on the importance of observing cues, verbal and physical, from a pregnant woman, and responding on the basis of that.

We’ve compiled a list of questions and statements that should be avoided.

You might look at some of these and go, “hey, this seems innocent/normal enough”.

But, trust us, most mamas prefer not to receive all this attention and interest.

So, keep reading to find out what you shouldn’t be saying.

  1. Do you mind if I touch your belly / again?
  2. You’re so tiny, I can barely tell that you’re pregnant!
  3. Wow, you’re so big.
  4. You look like you’re ready to pop!
  5. You look farther along than that.
  6. Your tummy is wide, it’s definitely a girl.
  7. Your back must be killing you with all that weight.
  8. How do you move with that belly of yours?
  9. Was the pregnancy a planned one?
  10. Are you wishing for a boy or girl?
  11. Have you picked out baby names as yet?
  12. Are you going to have a natural birth?
  13. How are you going to manage twins?
  14. Are you going to have an epidural?
  15. Do you plan on breastfeeding?
  16. You really shouldn’t be doing this or that when you’re pregnant.
  17. Let me tell you, when I was pregnant…
  18. Will you hire help after the baby is born?
  19. You should’ve just combined your yearly leave with your maternity leave!
  20. Enjoy your freedom while you can.
  21. Be prepared to never sleep again.
  22. I’m so surprised, I thought you didn’t want children.
  23. My tummy was flat after my first; you’ll bounce back in no time.
  24. Aren’t you too old to have a baby?
  25. You should have your second withing a year and a half.

If you need guidance on what to say, you can always start by asking her how she’s feeling.

This will giver her the opportunity to express herself.

Next, move on to how you could be of help.

Let her know that you’re happy to offer advice if, and only if, she needs it!

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